Titles that J.D. Salinger considered but ultimately rejected before settling on Catcher in the Rye:

• Pitcher in the Millet
• Shortstop in the Barley
• First Baseman in the Winter Wheat
• Utility Infielder in the Flax
• Third Base Coach in the Triticale
• Umpire in the Oats
• Bat Boy in the Amaranth

A partial list of things which, as a result of disinterest so profound it borders on the hostile, I hereby publicly express an unwillingness to give:

• a hoot
• a fig
• a dang
• a darn
• a damn
• a tinker's cuss
• a crap
• a good God damn
• a shit
• a rat's ass
• a fuck¹

1: neither the flying variety nor the more common flightless variety shall be given