I can't help it; whenever I hear or read about tea parties, the image that comes to mind is a little girl serving imaginary tea to her imaginary friends.
I guess that's pretty accurate.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Friday, April 03, 2009
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
I'll change if you vote me in as the pres, The President of your soul.
Yes we can.
Yes we did.
Yes we will.
Yes we did.
Yes we will.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Giant Mutant Cockroach interviews Joe the Plumber
GMC: So, Joe . . . Can I call you Joe?
JtP: Sure, why not. Can I smash you with a shoe?
GMC: I'd rather you didn't. So let's drop the pretense. You're not really Joe the plumber, are you?
JtP: And you're not really a giant cockroach.
GMC: Touché.
JtP: But in any case, it doesn't matter that I'm not the real Joe the plumber, because the Joe the plumber that John McCain and Sarah Palin have been talking about is not the real Joe the Plumber. They've been talking about me.
GMC: So who are you, exactly?
JtP: I'm the Joe the Plumber that lives in the heart of every real American. And Barack Obama wants to raise my taxes. And that's downright unamerican.
GMC: But Joe, Obama will only raise taxes on those earning more than $250,000 a year. You don't earn anywhere near that much, do you?
JtP: See, that's the really insidious part of Obama's evil plan. Sure, I'm not earning that much yet. But someday I might! That's my dream, that's the American dream, and Barack Obama wants to tax the American dream! Sure I may only be pulling in thirty grand now, and I may be living in a rented doublewide, but at night I dream of owning a mansion. A really huge mansion. But as soon as I start dreaming, along comes Obama, saying he'll raise my taxes, and because of that I'll only be able to afford a 9,000 square foot mansion, instead of the 9,500 square feet I always dreamed of! Instead of buying a Rolls Royce, I'll have to settle for a Bentley. Hell, if I gotta compromise my dreams that way, it's not even worth striving for them. In fact, I don't think I'll even go in to work tomorrow.
GMC: Damn, Joe, that is bad. I never realised that when you raise taxes on the rich by even a small amount people will stop wanting to be rich. That could have a devastating effect on the whole economy!
JtP: Sure, 'cause if you can't be dirty, stinkin', filthy rich, what's the point? You might as well just be poor.
GMC: So if that's the case, why doesn't John McCain propose cutting taxes on the rich to zero? Then the poor would have no excuses any more. They couldn't help but work hard to try to be rich!
JtP: How do you know he won't do just that? Didn't you hear him last week when he said he's got the Democrats right where he wants 'em? He's been lulling them into complacency, and next week, in the final week of the campaign, he'll spring his "zero taxes on the rich" plan on the unsuspecting public. And it'll be too late for the Democrats to react. John McCain will win in a landslide!
GMC: Christ, what a maverick!
JtP: Yeah, it almost makes me feel sorry for the Democrats. They'll never know what hit 'em.
JtP: Sure, why not. Can I smash you with a shoe?
GMC: I'd rather you didn't. So let's drop the pretense. You're not really Joe the plumber, are you?
JtP: And you're not really a giant cockroach.
GMC: Touché.
JtP: But in any case, it doesn't matter that I'm not the real Joe the plumber, because the Joe the plumber that John McCain and Sarah Palin have been talking about is not the real Joe the Plumber. They've been talking about me.
GMC: So who are you, exactly?
JtP: I'm the Joe the Plumber that lives in the heart of every real American. And Barack Obama wants to raise my taxes. And that's downright unamerican.
GMC: But Joe, Obama will only raise taxes on those earning more than $250,000 a year. You don't earn anywhere near that much, do you?
JtP: See, that's the really insidious part of Obama's evil plan. Sure, I'm not earning that much yet. But someday I might! That's my dream, that's the American dream, and Barack Obama wants to tax the American dream! Sure I may only be pulling in thirty grand now, and I may be living in a rented doublewide, but at night I dream of owning a mansion. A really huge mansion. But as soon as I start dreaming, along comes Obama, saying he'll raise my taxes, and because of that I'll only be able to afford a 9,000 square foot mansion, instead of the 9,500 square feet I always dreamed of! Instead of buying a Rolls Royce, I'll have to settle for a Bentley. Hell, if I gotta compromise my dreams that way, it's not even worth striving for them. In fact, I don't think I'll even go in to work tomorrow.
GMC: Damn, Joe, that is bad. I never realised that when you raise taxes on the rich by even a small amount people will stop wanting to be rich. That could have a devastating effect on the whole economy!
JtP: Sure, 'cause if you can't be dirty, stinkin', filthy rich, what's the point? You might as well just be poor.
GMC: So if that's the case, why doesn't John McCain propose cutting taxes on the rich to zero? Then the poor would have no excuses any more. They couldn't help but work hard to try to be rich!
JtP: How do you know he won't do just that? Didn't you hear him last week when he said he's got the Democrats right where he wants 'em? He's been lulling them into complacency, and next week, in the final week of the campaign, he'll spring his "zero taxes on the rich" plan on the unsuspecting public. And it'll be too late for the Democrats to react. John McCain will win in a landslide!
GMC: Christ, what a maverick!
JtP: Yeah, it almost makes me feel sorry for the Democrats. They'll never know what hit 'em.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
"Here I come to save the day!"
John McCain is fast becoming the Andy Kaufman of presidential politics. When he calls a press conference to invite Obama to agree to changing the format of the debate to a wrestling match, you'll know it's all over.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
America, this is the LAST thing we need in a President.
John McCain, appearing on the Rachel Ray show:
"My hero is Jack Bauer," he said.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Good practical advice.
Always make sure the cap is screwed on before you begin to aggressively shake the bottle of salad dressing.
Friday, August 08, 2008
What is the sound of one shoe dropping?
The Anonymous Liberal has more on the gang that couldn't forge straight.
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Modus Operandi
Remember last year when former CIA analyst Ray McGovern accused Vice President Dick Cheney of being behind the Niger forgeries?
Now Ron Suskind claims in his new book that the White House ordered the CIA to forge a back-dated, handwritten letter from the head of Iraqi intelligence to Saddam Hussein that would state that 9/11 ringleader Mohammad Atta had actually trained for his mission in Iraq.
From the linked Politico article: “It is not the sort of offense, such as assault or burglary, that carries specific penalties, for example, a fine or jail time,” Suskind writes. “It is much broader than that. It pertains to the White House’s knowingly misusing an arm of government, the sort of thing generally taken up in impeachment proceedings.”
I seriously doubt that this will lead to impeachment proceedings, and that doesn't really bother me. Sure, I'd like to see it happen, but I'm sympathetic to the argument that at this point in the election cycle impeachment proceedings might be counterproductive to the aim of making sure Barack Obama wins the election in November. What does bother me somewhat is the possibility that Congress won't even make a serious effort to investigate the truth of Suskind's claims, and that even if they attempt to do so the White House will successfully stonewall the investigation, as they have countless times before. But what bothers me the most is the likelihood that the vast majority of the American public won't get even slightly angry about this, that we won't see the sort of public outrage about this that would make Congress seriously consider impeachment. Instead, the public will be distracted by the thought that in some way Barack Obama is somehow the political equivalent of Paris Hilton. I hope I'm wrong about this, but I fear I'm not.
Grrrrrrrr.
Now Ron Suskind claims in his new book that the White House ordered the CIA to forge a back-dated, handwritten letter from the head of Iraqi intelligence to Saddam Hussein that would state that 9/11 ringleader Mohammad Atta had actually trained for his mission in Iraq.
From the linked Politico article: “It is not the sort of offense, such as assault or burglary, that carries specific penalties, for example, a fine or jail time,” Suskind writes. “It is much broader than that. It pertains to the White House’s knowingly misusing an arm of government, the sort of thing generally taken up in impeachment proceedings.”
I seriously doubt that this will lead to impeachment proceedings, and that doesn't really bother me. Sure, I'd like to see it happen, but I'm sympathetic to the argument that at this point in the election cycle impeachment proceedings might be counterproductive to the aim of making sure Barack Obama wins the election in November. What does bother me somewhat is the possibility that Congress won't even make a serious effort to investigate the truth of Suskind's claims, and that even if they attempt to do so the White House will successfully stonewall the investigation, as they have countless times before. But what bothers me the most is the likelihood that the vast majority of the American public won't get even slightly angry about this, that we won't see the sort of public outrage about this that would make Congress seriously consider impeachment. Instead, the public will be distracted by the thought that in some way Barack Obama is somehow the political equivalent of Paris Hilton. I hope I'm wrong about this, but I fear I'm not.
Grrrrrrrr.
Saturday, August 02, 2008
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