What are those kids up to?

From deep in the Mineshaft, apostropher points out the most exquisite example of generation-gap-cluelessness ever documented.

ATM

When I encounter the letters ATM and my brain begins to decipher their meaning, there are three distinct phrases that spring to my mind. And it is with an odd mix of shame and self-acceptance that I realize that the meaning that the vast majority of Americans would assign to those letters is #3 on my list, and that #1 and #2 on my personal list are too raunchy and/or obscure to appear on this list.

Update, for the curious.

Inquiring minds may be interested to know that the Ego did not take my advice. He is much more of an optimist than I am. So he and Mrs. Ego are still together. All in all, I guess it's a good thing that the he is the Ego and I am just the Alter Ego. But man-oh-man, he and she have some serious shit to work through. And to be fair to her, she is not the only crazy one in the relationship. Hell, the existence of this blog, complete with the whole "Alter Ego" pretense, should be evidence enough of that.

But enough about that, already. How 'bout them Sox?

Wise beyond their years.

Here are some valuable insights by kids aged 7-10 on the subject of marriage. Ah, if I knew then what they know now . . .

Clarification needed.

Todays CNN.com Quick Vote poll question is "Would you want to own a car that can swivel 360 degrees?"

My question in response: Around what axis?

I mean, are we talking roll, pitch, or yaw?

Update: Apparently, they are referring to this thing. Armed with this information, I can confidently say I would not want to own such a car. However, scaled down it would make a pretty good Halloween mask.

I got it bad.

Symptom: You find yourself checking your own blog hoping to find something new and amusing.

Diagnoses welome.

Looking for logic in all the wrong places.

There's one thing that has always bugged me about the song "You're So Vain":

If you happen to be the person the song is actually about, it's not really a sign of your vanity if you think the song is about you, right? I mean, the song is, in fact, about you, so your recognition of this fact does not constitute additional evidence of your vanity.

Am I wrong here?

Note to the Ego:

Dear Ego,

Stop trying to save crazy women from themselves.

It doesn't work.

So just stop it.

OK?

Sincerely,

Your Alter Ego

High time for a walk on the real side.

Things are not looking good for Mr. Ego. Or maybe they are. It's hard to tell, it's hard to tell.

OK, Mr. Ego. It's your move.

And stop being such a pussy.

Pictures came and broke your heart.

"And now I understand the supernova scene" is a much better line than "and now I undersand the problems you can see," despite or maybe because of the fact that I have no idea what it means.

(Google if you're curious.)